On a calm, flat grassy field, a somewhat small herd of sheep could be found. They spent their days frolicking, grazing, and enjoying life as sheep normally do. Sure, it got boring from time to time, but they were happy and nothing ever bothered them.
And in 3…
2…
1…
Until Gus appeared one day and came across the herd. Gus was a big gray and white wolf in suspenders with large, strong arms and an even larger appetite. Well he wasn’t a genius by any measure, he was rather clever and very persistent. He was taking a stroll through the nearby forest one day, and was wondering what he was going to have for lunch. Suddenly his ears perked up at the “Baaa” of some nearby sheep. Once he saw them, Gus started drooling and said to himself, “Well shave my tail and call me a possum! I do believe I just found my lunch.”
Dashing towards the sheep and jumping over the fence, Gus started grabbing as many as his arms could carry. After picking up a sixth sheep, he looked around and began to think out loud. “I wonder why there isn’t a big, strong sheepdog near all these sheep to guard ‘em.”
“Who says there isn’t?” said a distinctly female voice. Turning around quickly, Gus saw a black and white sheepdog wearing a plaid short-sleeved button shirt, khakis, and a red collar with the name “Carol” adorned on it. She had a slim, yet rather voluptuous figure, with breasts the size of coconuts and rather large hips. Gus also noticed that she had on bright red lipstick, and that her long black hair was covering her eyes. Thinking quickly, he figured she probably couldn’t see very well and proceeded to slowly move away without making any noise. After a good three steps in the opposite direction, Carol then marched right up to Gus and said, “I can see you ya know, and to be honest you’re not very clever.”
Carol then grabbed Gus by his neck and told him, “Ah’d suggest finding something else to eat sugar, because these sheep AIN’T for supper!” She then punched him square in the face, causing him to sail back into the woods.
*WHAM!* “OUCH!”
Fortunately, Gus’s fall ended up being broken by landing on something headfirst. Unfortunately, that something was a rather large rock, causing him even more pain. After taking a minute for the dizziness to wear off, Gus started to think of a plan to catch his dinner. “Hmm, what’s a good way to distract the sheepdog?”
“What if ah disguise myself as a sheep?” Gus considered the idea for a few minutes, but decided not to go through with it. “Naw, too cliche. She’d know it’s me just by looking.” Snapping his fingers, he then said, “Ah know, another sheepdog! Ah’ll just sweet talk her a bit, then trap her somewhere. Then it’s suppertime!” The thought of success caused the burly wolf’s face to adopt a sinister grin. He then ran back to his cave, and wrote a letter that he then mailed. After a few minutes, a package arrived with the words “ACME Sheepdog Costume” printed on the side. “Hehe, this is gonna be fun.”
To Be Continued
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