Salos vs. Captain Kiss

Salos watched the waves lap against the sides of the ship he was riding on as a cool sea breeze wafted through the air. Salos was on a cargo ship that was carrying him to his next destination across the sea. It was expected to be a relatively short, boring trip as he rested against a stack of boxes. The crew and few other passengers mostly minded their own business as a seagull flapped overhead. At the moment at least, it was a normal voyage.

“I don’t care for sailing, but this can be a nice way to travel.” he said to himself.

Salos was almost about to take a nap right then and there when all of a sudden an alarm began to sound. A loud blaring echoed throughout the ship as several sailors brandishing weapons ran by, shouting something about pirates. The other passengers looked at each other nervously as the sailors ran to the front of the ship. Should Salos follow them?

Salos decided to follow the sailors, ready for a brawl. Flames started to dance around him as he readied himself for a fight.

Salos reached the front of the ship as another one came closer and closer. A pirate ship with a black flag with a big red lip print on it was prominently displayed on the top of it, leaving no question as to what it was. Even from here, Salos could see beautiful women in skimpy pirate outfits looking at the cargo and passengers with lustful gazes as the sailors near him looked extremely nervous. 'It's the Kiss Pirates!' One of them said out loud, his face pale.

“Kiss Pirates? That sounds annoying.” he said to himself.

The two ships finally connected as the pirate women boarded the ship, stealing all sorts of cargo and 'attacking' the sailors. 'Take everything that's here! Every piece of treasure now belongs to the Kiss Pirates! We'd be here to plunder yer booty! Ha ha!' A commanding voice said as a woman that was clearly in charge walked forward. She wore a red corset and a matching skirt with a sleeveless black coat. Her smooth legs were covered in knee high boots and a gold trimmed tricorn hat rested atop her head. Her beautiful face had deep green eyes and plump red lips. While her breasts were also quite big, her booty especially looked large and soft, a trait shared with the other pirate women.

“Excuse me, but you and your sea sluts need to walk the plank now.” Salos said, stepping out with flames around him.

The pirate captain turned to face him as some of her crew gathered around, winking and catcalling the pyromancer. 'Oh? And what do we have here? A silly landlubber who be thinking he can mess with the most feared crew in the seven seas? What a laugh! What, come to offer up yer booty right away, have ye?' Captain Kiss said, not taking him as a threat in the slightest as she stared at him confidently, looking him up and down as she licked her red lips, eager to take her prize.

“No, but to light a cocky pirate on fire then yes.” he said as he tried not to be intimidated by her feminine presence.

The pirate midara laughed even harder as the crew made a circle around the two of them, continuing to taunt and tease Salos, some of them even turning around and slapping their large asses to taunt him. 'Well then landlubber. Let's see what ye got. Try and put up a fight if ye can. After all, the best booty to plunder is one that gives me a challenge!' She said haughtily as she waited for the pyromancer to make the first move.

“Fine then.....take this.” he said as he summoned a bow and aimed.

(Blazing bullseye)

Blazing Bullseye - 68

Kisslock - 79

Salos fired off a blazing arrow at the pirate, hitting her right in the shoulder and causing a small burn to form, making her curse under her breath.

She pulled out a flintlock pistol and kissed it before firing at Salos. A red pair of lips just like hers flew out from it, but Salos was faster and able to dodge just in time. 'Hold still, will ye, ye slippery scallywag!' She said, stomping her foot in frustration.

Salos: 30

Captain Kiss: 27, Burn 1/3

“How about no, you seawashed skank.” he said, throwing a barrage of daggers at her.

(Blaze daggers)

Blaze Daggers - 46, 58, 23, 9

Irresistible Booty - 98

Salos threw a barrage of flaming daggers at her, with three of them hitting their mark as she scrambled to recover.

But recover she did. And she had a devious plan in mind for poor Salos. She turned around and rubbed her massive bubble butt against his crotch, arousing him and smirking as she saw a tent form in his pants. 'Like my booty that much, do ye? It's the finest in the seven seas!' She boasted as she backed away, giving her butt a playful smack for good measure as Salos couldn't help but focus more on it...

Salos: 29, Weakness: Ass

Captain Kiss: 23, Burn 2/3

Salos was dazed, unable to look away from her bottom.

Turn Pass

Share the Rum - 46, Roll - 2

Salos was too busy staring at her ass to get out of the way of her attack.

One of the pirates handed Captain Kiss a glass bottle of rum. 'Here we go. How about a toast to our soon to be plundered booty!' She said, staring at Salos. She took a huge swig of the stuff, before grabbing Salos and giving him a huge, sloppy kiss, her red lipstick smearing across his mouth as the rum in her mouth was forced into his. The strong alcohol quickly made Salos woozy as he was forced to drink bunch of it. 'There ye go. Downed it like a real pirate.' The captain said with a nod as she watched him teeter back and forth.

Salos: 27, Weakness: Ass, Disadvantage 0/2

Captain Kiss: 22

Salos was trying to hold his footing. The captain’s lipstick on his mouth and the smell of rum on him made his head spin. He tried to summon a fireball and threw it.

(Fireball)

Fireball - 56, 9

Kisslock - 77

Salos fired a fireball, but the feeling of the lipstick and his inebriated state made his aim off by a wide margin.

However, quite amusingly, his somewhat drunken state made him dodge another shot from her flintlock pistol as another pair of red lips just barely missed him. 'Hmm. It might be time for something a bit harder to dodge.' She muttered under her breath.

Salos: 27, Weakness: Ass, Disadvantage 1/2

Captain Kiss: 22

“Damn it.” he said, summoning his bow and aiming.

(Blazing bullseye)

Blazing Bullseye - 57, 15

Kiss Cannons - 60

Salos tried his best to aim, but the alcohol he still tasted in his mouth once again dulled his aim as the arrow zoomed harmlessly off of the ship.

The captain and her crew stepped back, smiling deviously. 'Fire! Blast this scurvy scallywag!' She commanded. Suddenly, there was a loud boom as the pirate ship fired its cannons, sending a giant pair of lips right onto Salos, a loud smooching sound echoing as he was nailed right in the chest, sending him sprawling. At least the shock was enough to help him get over the alcohol. 'Bullseye. So how about it landlubber? Still raring for more? Or will ye have some sense and surrender already?' She asked him, crossing her arms over her large chest.

Salos: 22, Weakness: Ass

Captain Kiss: 22

He groaned from the kiss, the lipstick print covering his chest gave his outfit a very feminine look to it. “Do I need a pair of lips over my chest? I’m not some bimbo pirate like you skanks.” he said, summoning his bow and aiming.

(Blazing bullseye)

Blazing Bullseye - 34

Lips Mark the Spot - 96

Salos fired off another arrow, and with his newly found focus, he was once again able to land a direct hit, scorching her other shoulder.

She merely laughed, even as she got hit. 'Oh? From the way ye be bringing it up, it's like telling me crew and I that you want exactly that. So, landlubber? Wanna be a 'bimbo pirate'?' She said, only half joking as more devious ideas popped into her head. 'Hows about I give ye a fresh coat, then.' She said, applying a thick coat of lipstick to her lips as she gave Salos another passionate smooch, putting more lipstick onto his lips as the crew gathered closer, clearly intent on doing something to the poor pyromancer.

Salos: 21, Weakness: Ass

Captain Kiss: 19, Burn 1/3, Advantage

He was dazed from her kiss, standing there like a lump of dazed clay.

Turn Pass

Buried in Booty - 56, 10

Salos stood there, still feeling the lipstick on his lips as the pirate crew surrounded him.

Captain Kiss snapped her fingers as her crew of midara grabbed Salos and made him lay on the floor. 'Looks like ye be in for a keister feast. Be sure to give me booty a few good kisses, alright landlubber?' She said with a grin as her crew sat on Salos as they began to rhythmically rub their asses all over his body as they pinned him down. The captain then sat on Salos' face, her soft bubble butt smothering him as the pyromancer couldn't get away.

Salos: 18, Weakness: Ass, Bound

Captain Kiss: 18, Burn 2/3,